{"id":153,"date":"2015-02-12T15:28:00","date_gmt":"2015-02-12T14:28:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wheelcome.net?p=153"},"modified":"2022-07-11T11:38:10","modified_gmt":"2022-07-11T09:38:10","slug":"la-fille-qui-se-faisait-victimiser-par-son-chat","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/index.php\/2015\/02\/12\/la-fille-qui-se-faisait-victimiser-par-son-chat\/","title":{"rendered":"La fille qui se faisait victimiser par son chat\ufffc"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Les derniers mois ont \u00e9t\u00e9 particuli\u00e8rement intenses et riches en aventures ! Attendez-vous \u00e0 une d\u00e9ferlante d\u2019articles dans les prochaines semaines ! Voyage, panne de fauteuil, s\u00e9questration dans un parking et absurdit\u00e9 architecturale au programme !<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Mais j\u2019ai d\u00e9cid\u00e9 pour une fois de parler d\u2019un sujet un peu diff\u00e9rent des autres. Dans cet article, pas d\u2019ascenseur en panne, pas de gal\u00e8re en RER, un sujet du quotidien, mais qui r\u00e9serve quand m\u00eame son pesant de cacahu\u00e8tes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Comme vous le savez peut-\u00eatre j\u2019ai d\u00e9m\u00e9nag\u00e9 pour m\u2019installer toute seule il y a un moment. Et quelques semaines apr\u00e8s mon installation je suis tomb\u00e9e sur un petit chaton abandonn\u00e9 \u2013 impossible de ne pas l\u2019adopter \u2013 \u00e9videmment ! Je suis donc en collocation avec Boulbi, le bien-nomm\u00e9 depuis un peu plus d\u2019un an.<\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter size-full is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/wheelcome.netwp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-13.08.58.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-160\" width=\"600\" height=\"802\" srcset=\"https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-13.08.58.png 744w, https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-13.08.58-225x300.png 225w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p>(L\u00e0 il est mignon, mais ne vous fiez pas aux apparences,&nbsp;c\u2019est un LEURRE)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Et vivre avec un chat quand on est en fauteuil, \u00e7a peut donner lieu \u00e0 des situations\u2026 comment dire\u2026 franchement ridicules !<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Imaginez que vous \u00eates \u00e0 moiti\u00e9 paralys\u00e9 et franchement impotent face \u00e0 un fauve qui n\u2019en fait qu\u2019\u00e0 sa t\u00eate. Impossible de le pousser, de l\u2019emp\u00eacher de faire des b\u00eatises, voire de m\u2019attaquer sournoisement la nuit, autrement que par un faible \u00ab&nbsp;non&nbsp;\u00bb, mais sans geste mena\u00e7ant =&nbsp;<strong>victimisation totale assur\u00e9e !<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Je vous ai donc pr\u00e9par\u00e9 un petit top 3 des situations dans lesquelles mon chat se fout clairement de ma gueule.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>1. Il prend mon fauteuil pour un arbre \u00e0 chat.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"610\" src=\"http:\/\/wheelcome.netwp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-11.35.05-1024x610-1.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-159\" srcset=\"https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-11.35.05-1024x610-1.png 1024w, https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-11.35.05-1024x610-1-300x179.png 300w, https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-11.35.05-1024x610-1-768x458.png 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p>Et il l\u2019escalade, litt\u00e9ralement.<\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter size-full is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/wheelcome.netwp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-11.56.58-1024x812-1.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-158\" width=\"638\" height=\"505\" srcset=\"https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-11.56.58-1024x812-1.png 1024w, https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-11.56.58-1024x812-1-300x238.png 300w, https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-11.56.58-1024x812-1-768x609.png 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 638px) 100vw, 638px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p>Ce qui veut dire de mani\u00e8re tr\u00e8s concr\u00e8te que je me peux me faire sauter dessus sauvagement de la t\u00eate aux pieds \u00e0 \u00e0 peu pr\u00e8s n\u2019importe quel moment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>2. Il me barre la route.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Les chats ont normalement peur des engins motoris\u00e9s, et donc, a fortiori des fauteuils. Mais j\u2019ai eu Boulbi quand il \u00e9tait tout petit, donc il est compl\u00e8tement habitu\u00e9. Voire trop habitu\u00e9. Ce qui veut dire que m\u00eame si je menace de l\u2019\u00e9craser, il en a RIEN A FOUTRE.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Et son jeu pr\u00e9f\u00e9r\u00e9 consiste \u00e0 s\u2019\u00e9taler de tout son long<\/strong>&nbsp;(ou de son large, je ne sais plus vraiment tellement il est volumineux),&nbsp;<strong>au milieu du passage.<\/strong>&nbsp;N\u2019importe quelle personne normalement constitu\u00e9e n\u2019aurait qu\u2019\u00e0 l\u2019enjamber et tracer sa route. Mais inutile de vous pr\u00e9ciser que quand on est en fauteuil on n\u2019enjambe pas, \u00e0 moins d\u2019\u00eatre dans un film de Disney avec Un Amour de Coccinelle.<\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter\"><a href=\"http:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/coccinelle-saute.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/coccinelle-saute-1024x773.jpg\" alt=\"coccinelle saute\" class=\"wp-image-714\"\/><\/a><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p><strong>Non, ma r\u00e9alit\u00e9 \u00e0 moi ressemble plus \u00e0 \u00e7a.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"782\" src=\"http:\/\/wheelcome.netwp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-11.53.55-1024x782.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-157\" srcset=\"https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-11.53.55-1024x782.png 1024w, https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-11.53.55-300x229.png 300w, https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-11.53.55-768x587.png 768w, https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-11.53.55-1536x1173.png 1536w, https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-11.53.55-2048x1564.png 2048w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><figcaption>oul<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>Et \u00e7a peut durer des heures, ponctu\u00e9es de path\u00e9tiques et inefficaces \u00ab&nbsp;Boulbi ! Pousse-toi ! Allez d\u00e9gage !&nbsp;\u00bb. (Pour les plus cruels d\u2019entre vous, je vous arr\u00eate tout de suite, oui, j\u2019ai d\u00e9j\u00e0 essay\u00e9 de prendre de l\u2019\u00e9lan pour faire mine de l\u2019\u00e9craser. Mais je vous l\u2019ai dit. RIEN A FOUTRE).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>3. Il me prend pour un taxi.&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Vous connaissez surement les vid\u00e9os des chats qui se font promener sur les aspirateurs intelligents.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-rich is-provider-prise-en-charge-des-contenus-embarques wp-block-embed-prise-en-charge-des-contenus-embarques wp-embed-aspect-4-3 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Chat sur aspirateur!\" width=\"640\" height=\"480\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/J79V9u0jLmE?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>Alors moi j\u2019ai pas d\u2019aspirateur intelligent, mais j\u2019ai un fauteuil. Et pour lui c\u2019est pareil. Alors quand je travaille \u00e0 mon bureau dans ma chambre, il saute sur mon cale-pied, et il me donne des coups de pate jusqu\u2019\u00e0 ce que je bouge. Au d\u00e9but je ne comprenais pas trop ce qu\u2019il attendait, mais je n\u2019ai pas mis bien longtemps.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Monsieur me demande de le conduire de ma chambre \u00e0 son bol de croquette dans la cuisine.<\/strong>\u00a0Et il ne descend qu\u2019une fois arriv\u00e9 \u00e0 destination. Grosse feignasse !<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-rich is-provider-prise-en-charge-des-contenus-embarques wp-block-embed-prise-en-charge-des-contenus-embarques wp-embed-aspect-16-9 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"WHEELCOME - Chat roule ?\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/NpDYD5BRubc?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p><br><strong>Mais heureusement, j\u2019ai quand m\u00eame r\u00e9ussi \u00e0 lui apprendre un num\u00e9ro de dressage incroyable qui chaque jour me sauve la vie ! Allumer la lumi\u00e8re !<\/strong>\u00a0Et \u00e7a c\u2019est vachement cool parce que moi, je ne peux pas le faire.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>L\u2019ann\u00e9e derni\u00e8re j\u2019\u00e9tais malade une journ\u00e9e, et j\u2019\u00e9tais donc contrainte \u00e0 passer la journ\u00e9e toute seule du matin au soir. La personne qui \u00e9tait venue s\u2019occuper de moi le matin avait tout pr\u00e9par\u00e9 pour que je sois autonome jusqu\u2019au soir (verres d\u2019eau \u00e0 gogo sur la table, repas froid pr\u00eat, chargeur de t\u00e9l\u00e9phone \u00e0 port\u00e9e de main etc.). Mais on avait toutes les deux oubli\u00e9 un petit d\u00e9tail. Le matin il faisait jour, mais en plein mois de f\u00e9vrier, la nuit tombe \u00e0 17h, et je devais rester seule jusqu\u2019\u00e0 19h. Je m\u2019en suis aper\u00e7ue au moment o\u00f9 le jour commen\u00e7ait \u00e0 d\u00e9cliner,\u00a0<strong>et IMPOSSIBLE d\u2019atteindre l\u2019interrupteur.<\/strong><br>Seule, malade et abandonn\u00e9e dans le noir (oui ma vie est dure), je commen\u00e7ais \u00e0 m\u2019ennuyer s\u00e9rieusement, jusqu\u2019au moment o\u00f9 un \u00e9clair de g\u00e9nie m\u2019a illumin\u00e9 ! J\u2019allais apprendre \u00e0 Boulbi \u00e0 m\u2019allumer la lumi\u00e8re ! J\u2019ai d\u00e9gain\u00e9 un laser pointeur, et l\u2019ai fait courir dans tout l\u2019appartement (le chat hein pas le laser), petite prise d\u2019\u00e9lan, et hop ! Saut en hauteur jusqu\u2019\u00e0 l\u2019interrupteur !<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"832\" src=\"http:\/\/wheelcome.netwp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-12.57.38-1024x832-1.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-155\" srcset=\"https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-12.57.38-1024x832-1.png 1024w, https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-12.57.38-1024x832-1-300x244.png 300w, https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/Capture-de\u0301cran-2015-02-12-a\u0300-12.57.38-1024x832-1-768x624.png 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>Depuis ce jour, les t\u00e9n\u00e8bres de ma vie se sont dissip\u00e9es.<br>Oui. C\u2019est beau d\u2019avoir un chat.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Les derniers mois ont \u00e9t\u00e9 particuli\u00e8rement intenses et riches en aventures ! Attendez-vous \u00e0 une d\u00e9ferlante d\u2019articles dans les prochaines semaines ! Voyage, panne de fauteuil, s\u00e9questration dans un parking et absurdit\u00e9 architecturale au programme ! Mais j\u2019ai d\u00e9cid\u00e9 pour une fois de parler d\u2019un sujet un peu diff\u00e9rent des autres. Dans cet article, pas [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[92,93,18,19],"class_list":["post-153","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-amimaux","tag-boulbi","tag-chat","tag-fauteuil","tag-handicap"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>La fille qui se faisait victimiser par son chat\ufffc - Wheelcome<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/wheelcome.net\/index.php\/2015\/02\/12\/la-fille-qui-se-faisait-victimiser-par-son-chat\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"fr_FR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"La fille qui se faisait victimiser par son chat\ufffc - Wheelcome\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Les derniers mois ont \u00e9t\u00e9 particuli\u00e8rement intenses et riches en aventures ! Attendez-vous \u00e0 une d\u00e9ferlante d\u2019articles dans les prochaines semaines ! Voyage, panne de fauteuil, s\u00e9questration dans un parking et absurdit\u00e9 architecturale au programme ! Mais j\u2019ai d\u00e9cid\u00e9 pour une fois de parler d\u2019un sujet un peu diff\u00e9rent des autres. 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